The Comparison Trap: How to Stay in Your Own Creative Lane
It’s an all-too-familiar feeling: you’re scrolling through social media and see another picture book deal announcement. Someone got an agent. Someone else won a contest. Meanwhile, your manuscript is still in revision—or sitting in a submissions inbox, waiting.
Cue the spiral:
Why them and not me? What am I doing wrong? Should I even keep going?
Here’s the truth: comparison is a trap. It saps your creative energy, distorts your progress, and feeds the myth that success is a race with only one winner. But picture book publishing isn’t a zero-sum game. Another writer’s success doesn’t reduce your chances—it just proves that the path is real and walkable.
How to Stay in Your Own Lane
1. Track your own milestones.
Did you finish a draft? Revise based on tough feedback? Find a critique group? Sign up for a workshop? Submit to an agent for the first time? Those are wins. Keep a progress log so you can see how far you’ve come.
2. Curate your inputs.
If certain social media accounts spark comparison rather than inspiration, it’s okay to mute them for a while. Instead, follow creators who are transparent about their process and setbacks—not just their highlight reel. Jane Yolen is not only one of the most prolific children’s authors of our time, she also still gets rejections and chronicles them on social media with grace. Follow her for an inspirational outlook.
3. Connect instead of compare.
Celebrate others’ successes—and then reach out. Congratulate a fellow writer or ask what they learned from their journey. Turning envy into curiosity builds community and celebrating someone else’s success makes it more likely yours will be celebrated when the time comes.
4. Revisit your “why.”
Remember why you write picture books in the first place. Reconnect with the stories you love and the children you want to reach. Your creative lane is unique because your voice is.
Comparison may be human, but it’s not helpful.
What is helpful? Choosing to measure your progress by your own growth—not someone else’s timeline.
